The Avalon Affect---Chakra Alignment???? I think so.....

If you have been reading my blog, you know that I am a mother of 3 children (a 2yo girl, and twin 9 mo boys), I work at the high school in town as one of the ESE Program Specialist's there, I am a grad student at Florida State AND this semester I started clinicals, SO in addition to all that I do I am now a graduate student clinician 2 days a week AFTER work. I am BUSY BUSY BUSY and TIRE TIRED TIRED! So Basically, with this being said, I am not, will not, can not----- even possibly drum up an ounce of time to do anything that isn't going to benefit me or my family in anyway......You follow me I am sure. BUT wait!!! Today I absolutely made an exception for the sake of your health.....keep reading..... My friend, who we call "Marco" has been talking about these "light things" a.k.a. the Avalon Effect for a few months......and I am not into anything like this so while he has been talking about it I have been like "yeah yeah yeah yeah...." you know the type right?? Well yesterday I went to the dentist (Dr. Schwerer---who is FANTASTIC by the way) and I had a couple fillings replaced. Well while Dr. Schwerer was fixing my fillings he mentioned that the one looked pretty deep and may require a root canal---not excited at this point! So when I left I was instructed to take some Advil because the work that was done was more extensive than we all originally thought and he thought that I may be sore after my Novocain wore off. Well my mouth is pretty sore today, and I didn't eat last night, because my mouth was numb and I seriously looked like a stroke patient who was suffering from paralysis on the left side of my mouth so there was no chewing going on here...haha! Ok getting to the point....all day today I am sore again and I really don't want to call Dr. Schwerer up and ask him to do a root canal yet....haha...its been a day...seriously! I am not that big of a wuss....am I...never mind don't answer that....haha. So Marco stops into Brad's office, where I go everyday after work to switch cars and to remind Brad how exhausted I am, and he asked me how everything was going and I told him of my throbbing mouth and I asked him about those "light things", Marco says "well I have them in the car, do you have 30 minutes? If so then I will hook you up to them and lets see if we can alleviate some of that discomfort". As I am "drinking" my lunch---remember I am not eating because its looking like a root canal is in my near future---- I of course say YES!!! Which is the whole reason behind me making time to blog tonight..

Seriously, I am STOKED about these lights so much that I have talked to Marco 3 times tonight about them and have sweet talked my way into borrowing one of his sets to use again tomorrow. Here is what I noticed right away---at least a 50% reduction in my tooth discomfort, I feel like I just drank a "large iced coffee, with cream and sugar" from Dunkin Donuts---basically I have a crap load of energy which NEVER EVER EVER happens for me because I burn the candle at both ends every single day, AND I am always cold, and today my hands and feet are the same (or at least feel the same) temperature as every other part of my body. I noticed these 3 things from just 30 minutes and I really feel like my Chakras have been realigned.... I am all about this light therapy now. I want to buy one BAD!!!!!! SO, if you have read my blog this far down you are probably asking yourself some questions about this amazing light therapy. When I talked to Marco--the last time tonight--he told me that there is a meeting coming up on February 11th that anyone can come to, and he said that everyone that comes gets a free treatment with the lights. I am going for sure. I already told him that. You can come too, bring a friend or 5, and lets all learn more about this. I do not know how much they cost exactly because there are different packages, so it just depends on what you want to get. There is financing available for those with credit. This is seriously going to be the next big thing....I swear. I am not into promoting products AT ALL, and here I am so excited to share this with people that I am freaking blogging about it....what a nut case I am. Love it though. Anyways, if anyone is interested in getting in on some of this jazz tomorrow I will have the lights at my house and I would be happy to have you over to try them.......it is worth it. Takes 30 minutes....if you are interested message me, text me, call me....whatever! If you can't stop by tomorrow, come to the meeting on February 11th. Its at the Hampton Inns and Suites in Stuart. 1150 NW Federal Highway (its north of the Roosevelt Bridge about a 1/4 mile). Call 772-519-1555 to talk to Marc, tell him Jenny told you about the lights and ask ask ask your questions, set up a meeting with Marc and get in on the lights....

Holiday Update

Well it is December now and the twins are 8 months old, officially tomorrow. GG is just as funny as ever. This morning I woke up to her eating candy canes off the Christmas tree at about 4:00 in the morning. Speaking of 4 in the morning, there isn't a whole lot of sleep happening at our house currently. I swore up and down that MY kids would be in bed (their bed) and that I would be sleeping through the night by now....well apparently I was very wrong and 8 months of sleep deprivation is the proof that things are never what you think they will be, and I swear this lack of sleep is aging us by the second. I have tried various things to get the twins sleeping in their bed through the night and nothing has worked so far. Oh well... On a super awesome note, I am officially done with the semester at Florida State, so I now have 8 more semesters to go before I graduate. Seems like 8 is a lot, but as fast as time is going right now I am thinking that it will fly by. Well that is my little update from Fort Myers. Happy Holidays!

Postpartum Depression

Well, the days that followed both birthing a singleton, and multiples, proved to be emotionally challenging. I pictured having this amazing water birth in my home, with my husband, midwife, and best friend Stephanie here with me, and pictured it being totally perfect complete with rainbows and butterflies....ok well maybe not that perfect but you catch my drift. Well I ended up having to go to the hospital and ended up caving into every intervention in the book while I was there. I really was not expecting to be birthing any of my children in the hospital, but that's just the way it ended up being. The part that I really did not anticipate was the PPD that would follow. I had PPD with Georgia, but do not recall taking any medication for it. I just cried a lot and felt really anxious. I also worried that I wasn't going to be able to protect her. I think that the fears that I had during that time are more related to the experience that my sister and I had with our own mother. I just want to protect my children, and especially Georgia. She is so sweet and innocent, I just love that about children. They are all so perfect.

Well the PPD with the boys was pretty bad and I ended up going to Dr. Punger for help. She suggested doing several things which I think all helped, and continue to help. The few things that I really think helped me the most were: breastfeeding (by now you probably know that I love breastfeeding), baby wearing (I love having the baby close to me), and I take an antidepressant. Those few things really help me. I know that my boys are going on 6 months now, but I am scared to stop taking the medication, because I feel really content right now and I don't want to change that. I know that PPD can affect everyone, especially the baby, which is why I think breastfeeding helps so much. The bonding that takes place between my babies and me is very strong and seeing how happy my baby is when I hold him, makes me happy.

I have included a picture of me and Logan by the marina, downtown. I have to say that I really do love baby wearing. If is very comfortable, both for me and the babies. I had an Ergo until about a week ago. Brad spilled chlorine on it and it literally disintegrated. That was a great carrier too. There are many different types of slings and carriers made for baby wearing. I am a fan of ring slings personally, but you will have to find what works best for you.

Donor Milk

I have been a pumping machine for my little guys since returning to work, but simple math can tell you that the 12 ounces that I get when I pump at work is nothing compared to the almost 40 that they drink at day care. Obviously we needed to supplement....so I have been on a hunt for donor milk, and seriously "found the mother load" as Mel Fisher would say. I found a generous donor who is out of West Palm Beach. She has been pumping since August and accumulated about 1500 ounces of liquid gold. I had donor milk for a while, then ran out and had no choice but to give them formula. The boys have been getting mostly breast milk, with the addition of 1, 1o ounce bottle of formula a day while at daycare. I know that there is probably some crazy hippy ways of getting my milk to meet the boys demand, but the fact is folks, I am a working mom, a graduate student at Florida State, have 3 kids to take care of, 2 dogs, and a house! So while I wish I could just lay around and breastfeed to build my supply.....it's not going to happen. So while it lasts, the boys will be 100% breast milk babies again, which really makes me happy. I can tell a HUGE difference in their mood when they have formula. The are so uncomfortable, have excessive gas, spit up more, and do not sleep well when they get formula. If you think about formula, it really is pretty harsh on a baby's bowls. The whole reason behind waiting until your baby is a year old to give them cows milk, has to do with the lining of the intestines. If babies have cows milk too soon, the intestinal walls can become irritated and bleed. And what is formula made from??? Oh that's right....MILK! I don't know about the whole soy thing either. To be honest, all the estrogen in that freaks me out too.

Grad school is a whole other topic. Here is a brief overview of that part of my life. I have been working diligently on all the projects that have come up and am really enjoying my studies. I can honestly say that I feel like I am going to be really happy working as a speech-language pathologist. The projects that I have done so far this semester have eaten up all my spare time, and every weekend since August to be honest. It is hard finding time to do much of anything right now with the kids being as small as they are. Anyways, that's what is new with me.

Looking back......

I have these memories of my childhood that come up from time to time, some are great and make me laugh and some are painful and make me cry. This particular one came to me while I was lying in my bed surrounded by my Egyptian cotton sheets, and comfy down pillow that I just bought that afternoon from Target. I remember as a child wondering if I was going to make it out of the trailer parks and into a real house. I have a great dad and always have, it’s just that my parents were divorced and I lived with my mom and sister Jesse. Jesse was my best friend (and still is for that matter). She is older than me and went through everything first, naturally. We moved A LOT!! And by a lot, I mean every year and sometimes several times in one year. Jesse and I were enrolled in a different school EVERY YEAR. It sucked making new friends all the time, which is why Jesse and I were always so close. I remember her going off to school, and the bus picking her up and dropping her off at my grandpa Dionne’s junkyard (a.k.a. Dionne’s Cambridge Recycling). The bus would pull up in the morning and Jesse would get on happy and excited to see her friends, while I would be so sad to see her go (I was too young to go to school still). So I would spend the entire day around the junk yard counting tea bags, scribbling on pads of paper pretending that I was writing in cursive, making mud pies in the aluminum pie pans people would bring in to get money for, and chasing the many animals around. Then I would sit on the cinder block steps to my grandpa’s office on Georgetown Road, wearing my garage sale- dirt covered clothes, and wait for Jesse’s school bus to drop her off. That bus would pull up and I would be ecstatic to have my playmate, my partner in crime, my sister, and my best friend home. The windows were down, the kids were all yelling, and I could hear what they were saying. “Junk Yard Dog” that’s what I would hear them call my sister as she would be getting off that bus, that yellow ride of hope that promised that she would be something some day. It just made me so sad that she was being picked on. I hated it. I wanted to be on the bus with her so that she wasn’t alone. It seemed like everywhere we went, we were always isolated and alone, just the two of us. We never really fit in anywhere and it never really bothered me that much, but Jesse was always just a little more sensitive to that. We both have come a long way since we were “Junkyard Dogs”. We both have college degrees and good jobs. It’s crazy to think that this was a part of our lives. Jesse always tells me that I remember everything, and its true. I wish I could forget some things but I just cant. Anyways, all of these little things have shaped who we have become and who we have in our life. I hope that my kids never feel like Jesse felt getting off that bus, but if it happens hopefully they can see past it and move forward.

Total Defeat!

I have been doing an awesome job at keeping the twins at the breast, but the last week has been extremely difficult. I have been keeping them on the boob for 40-50 minutes at a time, and when they are done nursing they are still rooting around and cry as if they are still hungry. I really want my babies to be fed breast milk only, but I am quickly learning that I am not going to be able to do that. There are supplements that I can take that will increase my milk supply, but the ones I have tried so far taste awful!!!! And the other one, that my physician recommended, apparently causes breast cancer in lab rats (according to the disclaimer on the website) so I am not going to take that any more. I will take donor milk, but am leery of taking milk from people that I don't know due to the possibility of the transmission of diseases. I began giving the boys 4 ounces of formula a day, after breastfeeding them, and the extra 4 ounces seems to be the right amount. I make lots of milk, it just doesn't seem to be enough now......

Weightloss Frustration

So this is a picture of me 18 weeks pregnant with the twins. And if I were to post a picture in this outfit, I would look the exact same and its been 12 weeks since they were born. I want my stomach to go back to the way it was before I had my kids, and I want to fit into my clothes again without having my belly hang over my pants. I weighed 180 pounds when I went to the hospital and I lost 30 pounds within the first few weeks, but after that the weight loss stopped. I have lost 5 pounds in the month of June, which I am happy about. I feel like I should be losing more than 5 pounds a month though. I workout every morning, watch what I eat, am breastfeeding, and I drink a ton of water each day. Every time I complain about the weight sticking around, everyone gives me the same response "you JUST had twins." I did have twins, yes.....but they are 12 weeks old already!!! WHAT'S TAKING SO LONG???!!!!